Tuesday, November 15, 2011

How do I live in truth?

This response to a letter from a student is being shared with their permission, their identity has been concealed to protect their individual self. Xoxo J.

hey Josie, it's time for me to ask YOU for some advice! I've been really struggling within myself about who I am and who I can be around other people. I know that sounds wierd, but it's like this incredibly hard shift for me to open up myself and just be the true me I really want to be... (this is all of the original letter I feel I must share, other than the quoted excerpts included in my response)

Hi student, It is wonderful that you come to me, for I feel I am in an energetic space to offer advice without my judgement or expectations, but from a place of sight and love of your most beautiful light-filled being that is just continuing to experience more and more bliss with each additional day! I have been working within myself and have had lessons within others that have approached me that this is my work, to offer loving guidance as simply and sweetly that you have me. So know that all advice given is offered from LOVE.

My work has been with the malas (the dust/dirt) that veils us from fully revealing our heart (to ourselves or to others - different steps) in relation to healing and continuing to awaken the wisdom of the body through the emotions (or E-Motion, energy in motion), and if you are unfamiliar with these connections I want to first share them with you, for then your own intuitive light self I am certain will draw additional conclusions with this information.

MALAS:
(1) ANAVA - Isolation, worthlessness, alone, "I'm not part of Source"
(2) MAYIYA - Difference, judgement, "I'm not like you"
(3) KARMA - Powerlessness, can't act/do, "I can't"

Emotion or E-Motion - all our thoughts are literally fluctuations of electricity = energy in motion. "Energy can be transformed, but cannot be created/destroyed" - law of thermodynamics (thanks Aaron Slade!)

The rasas (tastes/emotions) can be modeled around this expression of energy, that emotions are fields of energy with vibration that can be excited to a higher level of vibration, or condensed to a lower level of vibration. These rasas connect to the aforementioned malas like so:

(1) (Anava) - Sadness -> Compassion -> Peace
(2) (Mayiya) - Anger -> Courage -> Love
(3) (Karma) - Fear -> Wonder -> Joy

These are the concepts. Now my interpretation of them with your questions, which were vocalized so eloquently, my dear :) Our way of healing our vibration, as you have so found and highlighted within your life already, is through the physical body. Connecting to your body in a loving way, communicating with it, nourishing it, touching it and feeling it.

"The big thing for me is fear of being vulnerable. People have often told me that I could use a thicker skin," - Vulnerability, what does that mean to you? Define the word. Where do you feel this fear of vulnerability within your body? How does it feel like? Can you look at it, breathe while just feeling it, inhaling and allowing the sensation with no judgement, then exhaling and letting it start to release? Do you need to move your body to help it release? Breathing with movement is essential to move it through any contracted places within.

And growing a thicker skin - what does this mean to you? Is this connecting yourself more so to the power within your body? Is it strengthening your connection to the LOVE of the body, so your skin - as vulnerable, light and porous as it may become, will not deplete you, or allow others to deplete you?

You are already awakened to your spirit, to your guides, to LIGHT, it is truly magnificent to see. You have begun to awaken to the spirit within the physical body - LOVE, from all your connections to Father Sky and Mother Earth on the outside and in (finding the perfect outer world, surroundings and inner world of spirit and light and love) it is time now to see fully that you already HAVE all the tools you need to be completely YOU, Student, in all your light and shining glory! Woohoo!

I believe your work to reveal this is through the release of old fears that are not serving your high vibrational being and level anymore. Stay committed to engaging your physical body in loving movement - whatever it may be, feel your body fully, and if pain or contracting lower vibration surfaces in areas of the body, see it, feel it, breathe it, then release it. It is a daily practice of moving the physical body, while being constant in your faith within yourself - trust your TRUTH, your intuition and light being, and allow it to reveal. The reveal within yourself can take moments, it's through energetic intention and commitment. The reveal to others can be a little slower, depending on how much judgements the physical body is healing from as well. Know the "saboteurs" that come your way (and there will be some), are coming from a place of destructive denial of light - which can be disguised within anyone. This denial of light and love wants you to stay hidden, for this fear feeds it to no end. It provokes you and prods you with lower vibrational emotions and energies, to see if you will respond with fear instead of love.

Hence why the importance of empowering the physical body - this breathing, pulsing wonder of a physical being in this world, and in no other lifetime or timeline is so important. This is your fighting armor of LIGHT. For you to stand courageous, compassionate and full of wonder - even in the face of challenge from fear entities. Hold true to your love and light source, work on healing YOUR body ONLY.

In regards to my keen sense of life direction (thanks for the compliment!), it has come from this work.

" ...I'm super afraid of being 1:bombarded by the wrong type of energy from people who really have issues (been there, done that and it was enough to really discourage me from doing anything intutive)" - YES. As you heal, they will come, those little saboteurs, testing your strength and commitment to LOVE, ONENESS, INTIMACY, TRUTH. But now you can be prepared. Having highlighted your sensory reactions (how does fear feel in the body, how does love), then you will be able to not engage with them. Simple. Know that as your healing progresses, the tests will fall away, the saboteurs will have a more challenging time attaching to your auric field and coming into your life. You will be so strong in your connection to love and light that there will be no chance for them to harm you, only they will be left with a choice - to trust their own light, love and truth - or not. The harm that you feel others are doing to you (discouragement, judgement, expectations, etc.) must be reflected to you within this work (very revealing and humbling - phew!), why are you judging, etc. yourself, and how can you LET GO of those judgements, those discouragements and surround yourself in love?

"Once the teacher is ready, the students appear". Meaning, the students/clients you have received so far within your line of work are there to assist you in yours, always. Perfect example, I have been doing a lot of work in revealing my truthful authentic self within my physical body, and I believe this is starting to occur, since now I am receiving others asking me for guidance with this. I must have the tools if I'm asked to assist (from a place of love and non-sabotage - which obviously I KNOW YOU ARE COMING FROM!) :) :)

".. 2:being misjudged or untrusted by my employers or other people unfamiliar with intuitive stuff" - PEOPLE CANNOT MISJUDGE LOVE, they may not fully understand or comprehend your passion or purpose, but the misjudgements or lack of trust from others - again - is coming from within first and foremost, and simply being shown to you within others for you to dig deeper within yourself. Love is pure truth, and when others feel that from you, even if they don't fully understand, they feel, hear, see and sense that you are okay, not here to harm them in any way, but here to be of love. They will accept you for who you are. If not, go back to the saboteur idea, and choose to clarify your boundaries from a loving space with them. This may be a simple chat to clear up miscommunications (I know, it is hard to speak in truth, but have courage, be strong), or it could be you cutting cords with them. One thing that rings true loud and clear from my work is that clear and truthful boundaries coming from a place of pure love vary depending on the unique individual.

"3:not having enough of the right ideas-??" - Your ideas are your ideas. They are right, they are perfect for you. Ideas, creativity, is a divine gift, inspiration is in sweet connection of source. If the ideas are not coming, trust, be patient and continue to clear and move the body. Treat it to massages (from yourself or someone else), baths, yoga, tai chi, qi gong, running, cycling, whatever your movement pleasure - again LOVE this body and allow it to release it's own karma mala (fear of non-doing/powerlessnes) to give your inner world more space for divine inspiration. Ah, creativity, it will come ALWAYS when READY! Oh, and the outer space ( your own surroundings, may need clearing to, do a good cleaning, organizing and shifting of the energy around you! Yay!)

4:not having enough income from it (yikes!) - ah, and the biggy, the lack feeling. Yup, it's a doozy. Meditate on money, like literally with it in your hand. A great meditation on money, is free on Inelia Benz' site, I will share with you the link: Reconnecting with the Spirit of Money

So, to connect to that direction within life? That true capability of co-creating with Source/the divine? Look in the mirror. The physical one to see and heal and hear and love and feel yourself, release whatever negativity arises by looking it in the face with love and breathing and moving until it lets go of it's hold on you. Oh, and did I mention as you breath and feel, you may need to move and shake your body, and even move and shake your emotions? Meaning CRY, WAIL, MOAN, GROWL, whatever energy needs to be transformed, SOUND IT OUT!!! Then, the direction, the clients, the employers and employment possibilities will all reveal itself. The income will flow sufficiently with as much excess as you desire and belief that you can receive it.

It takes work to take the plunge in living your truth, in BE-ing your truth. Know that you are fully capable of doing so perfectly and beautifully! Continue to breathe, feel, move and feel...oh, and did I mention all done with LOVE? :)

xoxo J.

P.S. Please let me know if I can post my answer (with your name changed) on my blog. I feel this information and your questions can help many and should be seen by many. xoxo J

P.P.S. Oh, and the plan, my earthly being, will reveal itself in 3 month increments. So all you need to plan is the next possible season of love, the next year of living your dreams, and then the next five years. Mark them down in career, health, wealth and love, but start with your overall depiction of your spiritual purpose (goal) as well. If there needs to be more clarity on what you see, meditate on it firstly, and also - breathe, move, live, laugh and love and it will come. I LOVE YOU!

P.P.P.S. This is a lot to digest. Also, I tried to make it as short as possible. AND, this is the first letter of it's kind, meaning I am trying to share my personal healing work in a way that may help you. Whatever does not resonate, let it go. If there is ANYTHING THAT NEEDS TO BE CLARIFIED, or if you HAVE ANY QUESTIONS, please feel free to respond. xoxo J.

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